To the Editor:
My first HOMER ALERT was in 2007 when I sought the whereabouts of the real Hillary Clinton and called for DNA testing of Attila the Hun and Cindy Sheehan to see if either was her.
My second HOMER ALERT was a few years later when I sought the whereabouts of Al Gore and alerted the various swanky energy burning hotels for the midnight hours. It seemed that Al was frustrated when it was learned that the global warming records were cooked.
You remember the reports on Gore. I didn’t make them up. I’m not that good. Besides, I leave fiction for the drive by media. They are masters at it.
My third HOMER ALERT was when I desperately called for any former college student that recalls or admits going to college with either Barrack Obama or Barry Soetoro. The NEW YORK TIMES had been trying to find one and couldn’t. I asked for the responders to send their information to Donald John Trump Sr. I had an address at the time.
I now humbly declare a fourth HOMER ALERT as follows:
Whereas congressman Jim Cooper firmly entrenched himself as an ardent supporter and voter of Obamacare as reinforced by this past Friday’s vote, he surely desperately needs a young person under 35 in Cheatham county that will come forward and let him know that you will sign up for Obamacare even if the computer system won’t work and even if there are identity thieves and even if felons will sign you up as HHS secretary Kathleen (she won’t resign) Sebelius said they could.
Hey! That woman really goes for that diversity. Huh!
Remember potential heroes of Cheatham County, do contact Congressman Jim Cooper. He needs to know you exist. I need to know too since I will spend up to $10 for a medal of bravery, that you, as the first young enrollee of Obamacare brave the odds.
The medal will say, AS A YOUNG PERSON OF CHEATHAM COUNTY, I ENROLLED IN OBAMACARE. I WAS WILLING TO PAY SO MUCH FOR SO LITTLE.
Limit of just one medal. I only have $10 for this alert. I want it to really count as something special.
Homer R. Dodson
Of East Belltown